so good to be back!

finally back and moved in! gosh, it's so awesome.

mom went with me to come back. i drove the whole way, which doesn't really bother me, since i know she'll have to drive the whole way back herself. but then she insisted we set up the crock pot to make a pot roast stew thing, then go to kroger, then to lowes. and so now i have some random food things, but not, like, bagels. and i just used the last of my shortening to make brownies which are practically glued to the pan. i had a hard time getting one 'piece' out with a fork. it's pretty much just crumbles.

i've been feeling rather domestic today. i cleaned up my mess from last night and made brownies to sorta apologize for nicole eating most of the roast from last night. i changed my sheets and put my nice flannel ones on. i finished that fleece hoodie mom started forever ago - and now i jsut have this urge to sew things. so i looked through the jean book, intending to start something, but i need so many notions for everything...

so i decided to make something with those extra tshirts anna found last year, only i sniffed them and they smell like man. so i have to wash them before i can do anything with them. and i almost typed 'warsh' there...

so now i'm waiting for the dryer to finish so i can start sewing again. i just really want to sew! i'm planning on making a shirt with the border of a bandana on it for a neckline. and i hope it looks cool... i might just make it a vest or something cuz i have 5 mediums and 1 small.

i have a closet again! it's awesome. mom let me have the hanging rack that was in her sewing area since my actual closet is pretty much unusable. it fits perfectly in the indent where rachel's poster is. only now you can't really see the poster... i hung up all my senior invites next to shelley's painting above my sewing table. looking through them makes me happy, especially because i have a mini copy of ben guthorn's bawlmer hon.

i suddenly feel like talking about my most favoriteest fill ever. it's ongoing, and is updated about twice a day, which is really nice. the prompt was this:

Matthew and Alfred say their farewells, promising to meet the next day for lunch, and they depart in their own directions, each heading for home. Matthew walks happily, not really taking in his surroundings, and turns down an alley he always uses as a shortcut home.

And then, he feels the knife in his body. He looks up, and into a face he does not know, the details burning into his mind before the killer slashes again, this time more fatally. Matthew falls to darkness.

And wakes, the sent of plywood and diesel around him. It's pitch dark, and he is flat on his back. He reaches up to realize he is trapped on all sides by wood, and he panics. He screams, knowing no one can hear him, and pounds on the wood, sobbing, vainly trying to reign in his terror.

And then, he can hear them. The voices of the others. The other victims of this killer, all buried like he is now, buried in the Canadian wilderness.

What I would like is a fleshing out of this, please. How is he found? What would be the consequences if he is never found, and he is trapped in an airless box, doomed to forever die of asphyxiation, and come back again, only to die over and over again?

it apparently came to OP in a dream, which is pretty terrifying. and at first i didn't want to read it, but for some reason i decided to give it a try. and boy am i glad i did. because it's amazing. and kinda terrifying at times, and very dark. but i love it. there's 41 parts right now. and it's nowhere near done. currently, Alfred and Matt are going around Canada and digging up the other victims and placing Canadian flags at their heads, then calling the police to find them. Matt was in that box for about 3 and a half months, so he's a little 'off' now.

read it here~

not that anyone will... i'm not even sure why i take the time to rant about these things here...

in other news, ces is planning to hit the gym tomorrow [for a real work out, not just to check it out] and i'm tempted to go with. because this new place sounds amazing.

also, i now have about a zillion pills to take. i'm trying the natural approach to dealing with my ADD, which means fish oil, omega-3, and DHA! fred recommended this one pill that's highly concentrated omega-3 and DHA, and when i opened the bottle they're gel-filled capsules. like, i can see the gel and it moves a bit. weird. they also smell vaguely of fish, and gave me slight fish breath for a while. in addition to that, i've got a vitamin, a B + C + iron pill [that looks like sprinkles in a capsule], and zyflamend for my stupid ankle. and at night i'm going to start taking melatonin to help me sleep better.

after this past more-than-a-month of going to bed around 10 and getting up by 9 at the latest has completely thrown off my 'normal' school cycle. so i went to bed around 12:30, and finally couldn't stay in bed at 9:30. though i had been more or less awake since around 8-8:30. which i guess is good because my classes start at 9:30 at the latest. it's just a little weird because i was so used to staying up late and sleeping in at least a little bit. stupid work...

idek... crossdressing!maid!America and Canada!

nick and norah

so, i just got back from seeing 'nick and norah's infinite playlist' at the commons, and i really miss yasha.

it kinda sucks...

so, basically, nick and norah, among other things, end up driving all over new york listening to awesome music. and that's basically me and yasha, except, you know, in baltimore and the 'burbs, but whatever.

and as we were walking back to the dorm, i really just wanted to go driving with him. right then. no matter that it was 10:30 at night and he was almost 200 miles away. i just really wanted to. i'm still going through some serious yasha-withdrawals. and yeah, it does suck.

cuz i've done nothing today except sit in the dorm and watch things on a laptop. i watched, like, 3 episodes of 'monk' and 2 episodes of 'how i met your mother' and then i watched the last half of 'step brothers' in anna's room. i've got nothing to do with my life right now, and it's just bugging me. i felt really lame today, since i was doing abslutely nothing. i didn't even really eat out. i got a bagel to go for breakfast, ate that salmon pouch for lunch, and got subway on the way back from bubble tea [man, how i missed bubble tea!] which i proceeded to eat during scrabble in the alcove.

so. i'm not sure this is homesickness, per se, just missing-yasha-ness. yeah, i've got that bad...

man, i really wanna drive dover now! why does this suck?

maybe it has something to do with his birthday [that i missed] on wednesday, and the fact that no one told me what happened. well, he gave me a short overview: the surprise, watched 'pineapple express', played twister... but that's not enough for me. i still haven't seen any pictures up yet... and i was promised a ton of those from both jo and brit.

although, griping and blogging about this is only making it worse. and now i feel really bad...

ugh, reminds me of when he was doing all that fun stuff over the summer and i was being mopey and unpleasant...

eww, driving

so, i spent a lot of today driving. well, maybe not a lot, but more than usual.

i had to get up early to drive matt and dad to school and work so i could have the car. i got back around 8:30 and went back to sleep. it was nice.

course, the night before i was up till around 4... mom caught me still up at 3 when she brought a cat in to sleep with me. i told her i was going to bed then, but i just waited till she left before going back to what i was doing. which was reading this story on sapayne, which i haven't done in a while. somehow it's different now that i'm the one paying the monthly fee... which makes sense, i guess...

anyway, i watched the episode of house that was on tuesday when i did get up, and then it was time to get dressed and leave... for carver!!!

it's rainy and gross...

yasha and i met at carver for cafe. it's mediterranean week. he had a tasty looking shrimp wrap and i had pasta with pesto sause. very tasty. dessert was baklava, but not as good as mom makes it. of course.

we followed adashek to anatomy. on the way i was waylaid by stoll, who has really pretty curly hair now. she was excited as always, and it was nice. we darted in and ran to a table in the back to sit on. joseph was doing the potato and saltine test thing today, and we wanted to stick around for it. but there were other teachers to visit so we had to leave. we went to cook's, and found bri when we got there. cook was busy writing the last of his scholatic recommendations, so we couldn't stay for that long. then we found nate and followed him back to moore's class where yasha talked to her and i talked to nate. and then we went to the office and left a note for steele about the duct tape thing. yasha has to put together a nice email for her with pics and descriptions and stuff, and we're gonna try to get a meeting with her next friday to talk it out.

and then i drove home. i stopped at caribou on the way and got the best drink in the world, a turtle mocha. tasty.

i meant to get right into my drawing when i got back, but mom was in the family room and i didn't want to bother her or anything with the tv... so i ended up in my room, back on sapayne, until i had to go get dad.

and oh my god, that was the worst driving i've ever had to do. it's rainy and awful and dark out, and that was NOT fun. it's a good thing i'm so familiar with ward's chapel and berryman's and shit, otherwise that could've been very bad indeed.

so, having got nothing done on my drawing, i've got to finish it before, like, 3 tomorrow. hopefully val will be checking after that, or will check people and go back a bit later to check again, or something like that. cuz i've still got another 4-5 hours of work to do on that stupid thing before it's really finished and i can be happy with it.

wow, i haven't done a pic-a-day post her since thanksgiving. i've got a few more in the facebook album, but i've been slacking in the picture-taking over the past few days. ok, not since, like, thursday or friday.

my car. or, someone else's that looks like it...
'97 ford taurus station wagon, green-ish, over 160,000 miles.